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THIS WEEK’S RESOURCE: PODCAST
Sabrina asked four questions to help identify the need to grieve and the opportunity to do so:
- What is crushing your spirit?
- Have you had losses you haven’t acknowledged?
- Have you been able to ask God to give you that life line [his comfort]?
- Will you lay back in your Abba-Father’s arms and ask for him to hold you, heal you?
The grieving process does take time. It’s also not a one-time event. Grief does not come in a one-size-fits-all package, but grief is normal. Grieving the same situation will look different for everyone. There is a cost to taking the time and energy to grieve, but keep in mind that stuffing feelings and avoiding the grieving process may cost more.
If you’ve identified that you are ready to commit to the grieving process, take JB’s advice to connect with a friend, pastor/mentor, or a counselor. Grieving shouldn’t happen purely in isolation.
Grief and acceptance. (an endnote from Sabina)
When we think of the process of grief, the end isn’t that everything goes back to normal, or that we are able to “accept” that which will NEVER be acceptable! It simply means your brain has been able to gain flexibility again. When we are deeply grieving, our brain becomes rigid, much like when we are in fight or flight mode. We can’t really think straight. We often just react (anger, bargaining, depression). We are stuck. To reach a place of acceptance means your brain is able to think outside the box of grief again. It becomes flexible and not stuck in a depressed or as John stated earlier, less creative mode. You are once again able to think creatively, problem-solve, and truly live again. It doesn’t mean that you will be able to ever be the same as you were before the loss. No. You will always be changed, but your brain will allow you to be able to think more clearly and move you forward in new ways (and some old ways too), but you will no longer be stuck.